I recently had a discussion with someone that went along the lines of:
“I’ve been messaging this guy who's’ totally not my type. But he seems really caring, interesting and has been messaging me lots, which is what I want. He’s got loads of tattoos though! He’s asked me out and I don’t know whether to go”.
My response: “Go! Why do you have to make your mind up now? Have a few dates, then let’s have this conversation”.
Chances are, pursuing a certain type of guy has not got you where you wanted. So the easiest way to get different results, is to try different things. Which means experimenting with different types of guys.
I’m not saying you suddenly have to swing to the complete opposite of anyone you’ve ever dated before. Just be open to a few things that you weren’t before - perhaps someone from a different country, cultural background, or career (without necessarily all three at once!).
You don’t have to make up your mind straight away
I know so many women who have let great men go because they felt they had to make up their mind on the first date.
Don’t be one of them!
If someone isn’t your normal type, the first date could feel very different to what you’re used to. And this may make you think this isn’t right. In reality, it's just different, and could be exactly right for you.
But when in doubt, go back for more…
Give everyone a proper chance. If you’re not sure, keep dating/interacting until you are sure. It doesn’t mean you can’t date other people at the same time. You’re not wasting any time. But you are opening yourself up to the opportunity to develop something special.
I have three good girlfriends, now happily married, all of whom didn’t fancy their husbands until around the 5th date. 5 dates. Not 2 hours in a coffee shop.
Some couples take years to figure out they like each other!
I’m not saying you have to hang out with every guy you date ‘just in case’, but if there is even something there that you like, give it a shot and let them prove to you that this could be a good thing.
Let go of your ‘type’ and you will open up so many doors.
And your confidence will grow as you realise there are wayyyy more men out there than you currently think they are. Because there are - once you know where to look for them!