What different times we’re currently living through! I’ve put together a brief guide to share a more positive stance on what’s going on and help you navigate through these changes. I'll share how to handle loneliness, what to do to change your whole perspective on the current situation and practical tips for managing day-to-day life.
What to do if you’re feeling lonely
It can feel like a really testing time to be single. And I totally get that. I’ve been chatting through it with a number of my clients.
It’s ok to feel lonely. Many of you will be in a difficult situation, and it can highlight feelings of aloneness far more than normal.
Now is not the time to distance yourself further. Connect, connect, connect. Be the first to reach out to friends. Join in the online fitness and yoga classes, meditations, and, well, everything else, that is going online at the moment. Call people rather than just messaging. Set up Skype dinners.
Let your loved ones know how you feel.
And, I’ve also heard from couples driving each other crazy locked up together, and parents struggling to handle having kids at home. So the grass isn’t necessarily greener. What this will teach you is how to truly appreciate your person when he comes along!
Be conscious of the language you use
“This is a disaster” “This is so unfair” “It’s so awful that X,Y,Z”
The language you use out loud and in your own thoughts will have a huge impact on how you process these times. If you keep saying how difficult they are, your mind will pull up every shred of evidence that they are.
If you start focusing on the positive things, you can completely reframe how you feel about whatever situation you’ve found yourself in.
Right now, I’m busy “nesting” and curating our new home. Just referring to “nesting” rather than “isolation” completely switches the whole vibe and allows me to fully sink into actually enjoying what I am doing, rather than focusing on what I’m not.
Practice mindfulness and living in the current moment
Now more than ever before (even going through break-ups!), I’m appreciating the tools that are available to navigate uncertainty.
There are a lot of unknowns about the future, and you may be very concerned about your personal situation. But, every time you drop in and live fully in the present, none of those worries are there - because they’re about a future that may or may not happen.
What this situation is teaching us more than anything, is what we took for granted. What we thought was certain. What we thought we had control over.
We are being asked to let that all go. And that’s hard.
But it’s a fundamental truth of life - we could lose anything, everything, at any point. So we must make the most of every individual moment of time. Every smile, every laugh, every funny meme. Every moment that we have our health, that we have people to love, that we have a roof over our heads.
Chances are if you’re reading this, you are incredibly fortunate in the grand scheme of the world. Now is the time to be truly, truly grateful for that.
Meditate, read, paint, create, walk. Do the things that absorb you into the current moment, as much as possible. I’m posting short daily meditations on my Instagram account for you all.
Control what you can and accept what you can’t
Humans love control. It helps us feel secure. Right now, there are a few things you do have control about (your whereabouts, your routine, washing your hands). By all means, take control of these and do what you can.
But the rest, the rest is in the hands of God’s/the Universe/something greater. And all we can do is accept that right now. Fighting the things we can’t control won’t get us anywhere.
Find a routine that works for you
In the spirit of keeping control of what you can, make your own little routine that works for you. It can be as simple or as planned out as you like.
Incorporate the things that feel good to you.
It might be helpful to schedule your day - workout time, meditation time, a call with a friend, a walk, lunch etc. It’s amazing how these can split up the day so you don’t feel faced with long stretches of time with nothing to do. Now is an amazing time to start a new project - create a moodboard, plan some changes to your home, embark on a new fitness regime. Get creative and the time will fly! Or you may just want to make the most of having time to completely chill, catch up on sleep and not accomplish very much at all. You normally pay a lot of money to go on holiday to do that - now you're being given it for free!!
Nurture the relationships you do have
When everyone is feeling the pressure, it’s so easy to either snap at or push away those who love us the most. Or feel that you are being “needy” or “clingy”. Let all of that go.
Reach out to people more than ever. Have compassion and be kind. Appreciate that everyone is navigating this in their own way. Try and see their perspective.
Keep breathing, keep calm and know that this too will pass.
Sending you a massive smile and a virtual hug